Attachment Belonging Boundaries Confidence Ecology Embodiment Emergence Emotional Sobriety Eros Freedom Intimacy Love Metabolizing Oracle of Emergence: An Evolutionary I Ching Relationships You Deserve Gentleness


Emergence beyond embodiment. Spacious and permeable skin. Surrender to ease. There’s no need to force anything.

You’re naturally splendid. What you do is as obvious and inevitable as what a plant does. You simply move with the time. You are revealed as it is revealed. You emerge from causes and conditions without friction. Your body knows what to do. Let it lead.

When things move in this way, you know you are with what is yours, doing what is yours to do. You don’t feel confused, do you? No more than the sun and moon are confused about exactly where they belong in this moment and what they are doing. Weather may obscure their light here and there, but sun and moon keep showing up.

Yield to motion like sun and moon, steady and reliable. They make vast and easy progress across the sky, illuminating everything. You are their companion, luminous like this.

You are out of danger of self-abandonment as you feel the ease upon you now. The self of non-self: embedded, embodied, enacting.

You don’t need to wear yourself out going against the way. Continuous ease. Ease brings stability. Relaxation, stability, clarity. Patient, kind, and nourishing. Eternal, intimate, pure, and joyful.

Power flows now, supple as a summer river. Be grateful for this time of ease. Respect what is sufficient. No need to push for more. No need to push at all. Allow the river to run through you. Don’t dam it. Put your feet up and let it carry you. No gushing, just flowing.

Our culture mistrusts ease. I mean, if we embrace ease, can laziness be far behind? Their very different. Only one has self-compassion in it. Don’t confuse them. You will be received how you receive. Receive and be revealed. Only your responsiveness is in your control. Open your system to all available free energy, move with it and order will emerge.

A lot of people confuse slave mentality and work ethic. A good work ethic doesn’t demand extraneous effort. It’s not about showing how hard you can push, but how you can do what needs to be done. Can you feel the difference in your body?

Ease begets confidence. Extra effort limits. When we talk about that je ne said quo or “it factor” that someone has, it’s usually ease.

Ease increases your attractiveness tenfold.

Ease is a metabolic byproduct of Boundaries and Belonging–or is it the other way around?

No matter–it’s all part of the session I’m holding on Saturday Morning. It’s a half-day. It’s 85 dollars. I cap it at 10 people. DM for more.

Belonging Blame Boundaries Ecology Embodiment Emergence Emotional Sobriety Eros Freedom Fuck Suffering Metabolizing Oracle of Emergence: An Evolutionary I Ching Ordinary Joy Self-Compassion The Feminine You Deserve Gentleness

Balance is Bullshit

By the time you’re feeling in balance, you’re already ripening into something else. Like the tempered bullshit I spread out all over my garden, both balance and bullshit are always already giving way to new growth.

Balance is of the moment. When it arrives, I love it. When it departs, I love it.

Balance emerges from the reversals, like you.

My capacity to welcome and metabolize whatever comes, to absorb what nourishes and shit out the rest, is my lifetime practice.

Attachment Belonging Boundaries Confidence Embodiment Emergence Emotional Sobriety Freedom Fuck Suffering Love Metabolizing Oracle of Emergence: An Evolutionary I Ching Resentment Self-Compassion You Deserve Gentleness


Holy shit, I really squandered this day.

There were so many things I could have done, but after a spurt of productivity in the early morn, I just wanted to crawl under the covers.

I didn’t even go for a hike because it was so hot out.

I just went into a sort of suspended state with regular social media dopamine hits.

By 7pm I was fully disgusted with myself.

On the upside, I got to test out my theory of anxiety: that it’s a surge of energy to do what I need to do, and yet I’m refusing to do it. Anxiety ensues.

As I tried to write my way through the toilety spiral of squandering, I wrote AAAAAHHHHHHHH FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUCCCCCCCKKKKKK again and again until it broke itself down and I realized it contained itself. A sort of fractal of self-inflicted hell. A little microcosm of the source of itself, as every tiny thing is.

It morphed into AH, F*CC! and it’s made of:






With this easy, 5 step system—your misery is GUARANTEED!

Using the AH, F*CC! system, you can suffer all alone in your room!

You don’t even have to talk to anyone!

You already have everything you need to procrastinate your way into a balls-deep shame spiral!

With just internet access and a willingness to let your life force slowly seep out of you hour after hour:


Isn’t this a great discovery?!

The AH, F*CC protocol!!!

Is there a book in it?!


I’m so excited about it!

Jk, it kind of sucks.


• Doom scrolling (avoiding).

• Comparing myself to all the other brilliant women in my sphere (comparing, obvs)

• Complaining about the heat (complaining, obvs)

• Taking a nap because lunch (hiding)

• Not leaving the house all day (a twofer: hiding and avoiding)

• Pretending I don’t have to do a live today to finish filling my group that starts on Tuesday (hey, you should DM me to join the F*ck Suffering group that starts on Tuesday)

• Staring into space thinking about how great it will be to lead another fully transformative group for people even when they get all wriggly and uncomfortable and want to leave (fantasizing).

• Imagining I am already having sex on warm granite at Mooselukmeguntic Lake as if it were already Sunday (more fantasizing, obvs, but it went really well with the nap).

Avoiding, Hiding, Fantasizing, Comparing, and Complaining are all such good ways to cultivate separation, to sever connection, to be irresponsible and to really whip up some frothy othering.

The more I devote myself to separation and turn away from responsibility the more suffering I inflict and endure! Yay, me!

Why is it so tempting? Because vulnerability is almost as uncomfortable as responsibility and enacting the AH, F*CC is full of instant cheap thrills.

THE BUMMER: Once I’m aware I’m doing this, the 5 casual addictions lose their erotic thrill. I can’t get off on them anymore. I can go through the motions but I’m so excruciatingly aware that I’m squandering that the anxious buzz kicks up to a screaming pitch like a terrible dog shock collar. I can no longer bring myself to press my own slick heel against my own gagging throat in a fun way.

Once I saw the AH, F*CC, I couldn’t unsee it. All the kinky pleasure was gone from procrastination. There was no charge left in the squandering. Tomorrow I will have to go for a hike, finally do the dishes, and probably even sit down and finally finish writing the I Ching book. AH, F*CC!!!